One of those days

I am a shopaholic. I love to shop and I love a great bargain. When I see a bargain, I have a hard time turning it down.

This, however, gets me into big trouble as it did today. I was shopping the last week online for a book for the bookclub that I run online at Cafemom and I found it along with a few other things and bears. I love bears. My mom got me hooked when I was younger with her ever growing collection of Boyd's Bears. I also love Thomas Kinkade and his pictures so when you put the two together its hard to resist. Especially when its at a great price. I bought 5 Thomas Kinkade bears. They were only around $20 for the 5 of them. They are the cutest things.

Well dh saw them today and freaked out on me. Well actually he didn't freak, he just gave me that cold silent treatment that I hate and when I know something is wrong but he won't tell me. Ugghhhhh, I hate when he does that. I'd rather get a tongue lashing than a silent treatment. And of course he was on his way out the door when he finally decided to say something to me about it, which only makes it worse.

Now yes, I do know it's my fault. I'm the one that bought the bears when I knew we didn't have the money for them. I'm the one that asked him to wait until June to go to the dentist because we didn't have the money to pay outright for the visit (I'm trying not to use the credit cards when shopping). I'm the one that knows how much money we do have or in most cases don't have. He doesn't spend the time to look to see where our money is going so I'm not held accountable if I spend money we don't have. Does that make sense? It does to me. Let's see if I can explain it better.

I pay the bills, all the bills. I take care of all the monetary aspects of our marriage. He asks me how he's to pay for his gas. He doesn't buy anything, or almost anything. I do the grocery shopping, the clothes shopping, everything. If something were to happen to me, he probably wouldn't know what to do about money. Not that he's clueless about money but he doesn't know how to check out account, whether by phone, online or anything. He knows that we use a credit union that is based out of our state capitol but that's about it. He knows what credit cards we have, but probably couldn't name them. So because I know that he doesn't look at the bills and the checking/savings account, I know that I can spend money without him knowing too much. This has really bothered me. It wasn't always like this. He actually took care of most of the bills when we first start living together, but he would forget that the rent was due the first of the month and would end up dropping it off late, so when we got married, I took over everything. He doesn't seem to mind, most of the time. However I do, I can't stand him not knowing. I've even offered to have him sit down with me and go over the bills and credit cards and checking account. He just doesn't "have the time". Which by the way, is something else I hate about him (note I said about). He never seems to have the time. He has NO hobbies because he doesn't have the time.

Please understand that I do love my husband and don't know what I'd do without him. He is my everything but some days, I'd like to ship him out the door for awhile and not just to work, like today.